Saturday, April 30, 2011
YOU CAN'T ALWAYS BELIEVE WHAT YOU READ IN THE PAPERS.....Dermot McCann opened the morning newspaper and was dumbfounded to read in the obituary column that he had died. He quickly phoned his best friend Reilly. "Did you see the paper?" asked Dermot. "They say I died." "Yes, I saw it." replied Reilly." "Where are ye callin' from?"
Wednesday, April 20, 2011
Sunday, April 03, 2011
- In a Podiatrist"s office: Time Wounds All Heels.
- On a Septic Tank Truck: Yesterday"s Meals- On Wheels.
- On a Plumbers"s truck: We Repair What Your Husband Fixed.
- On another Plumber"s truck: Don't Sleep With A Drip....Call Your Plumber.
- On a Church's Billboard: 7 days without God makes one weak.
- At a Tire Store in Milwaukee: Invite Us To Your Next Blowout.
- On an Electrician's truck: Let Us Remove Your Shorts.
- On a Maternity Room Door: PUSH...PUSH...PUSH.
- At an Optometrist's Office: If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place.
- Outside a Muffler Shop: No Appointment Necessary; We Hear You Coming.
- In A Veterinarian's waiting room: Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!
- In the front yard of a Funeral Home: Drive Carefully! We'll Wait....
- Sign on the back of another Septic Tank Truck: CAUTION.....This Truck Is Full of Political Promises.